Went to the doctor's today...same old story - cold, slimy stuff followed by that funky noise followed by the brilliantly melodic sound of my heart! Whoosh! It's like music to my ears!
I've been living it up! Good friends, nice vacations, good food - ice cream, chocolate, buffalo wings...sky's the limit baby! My tiny taste buds are just lovin' it! Now...here's the downer...
Mrs. Smarty Pants doctor said that I was FAT! Can you believe it! Come on! I'm the size of a cantaloupe! You can't tell me that you've ever seen a fat baby that wasn't cute! Not like there's a "Biggest Loser" for newborns. There's so much talk about kids these days having low self esteem and this is the message that I get from the person who's going to help bring me into this world?!
So now I'm getting my first punishment...booo! Chocolate's been replaced by carrots. Pizza's been replaced by salad. Good thing I don't blame my parents for this. I'll hold it against Mrs. Smarty Pants doctor and pee on her when I get outta here!
